Terror Aftermath: An Open Letter to My Little Explorer

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To my 14-month-old explorer:

Wow – You are on the go, go, go! I admire your spunk and innocence. You have not one thought of the possibility of getting hurt as you climb chairs and up the stove. One day you’ll understand, but for now mommy is watching and ready to catch you when you lose your balance, and of course, I’ll always steer you away from danger.

I wish this would be the extent of my worries, but I know they already do run deeper. See, I wish I could protect you forever and shield you from violence and the evil that exists in our world. It’s scary for me to think there are possible situations when I can’t protect you because they might be outside of my parental control. For this, I am sorry.

A part of me envies you. I wish I could be oblivious to the dangers of the world and not be fearful of the “what ifs.” I wish I could still see the world as you do: exciting, new, limitless, and non-cruel. Naivety is such bliss sometimes.

You haven’t seen the evils that live among us, and I hope you first-handedly never do. See, as your mom, I want nothing more than to protect you. When your dad and I welcomed you into our life, we also brought you into the world that exists today. Let me be clear: the world is still a remarkable place, but even in a place of such beauty, there are people who CHOOSE to harm and commit heinous acts. I know this isn’t fair. Sometimes us adults don’t know why this happens and don’t always have a solution to the problem.

I’m sorry that someday you’ll be fully aware.

I’m sad that we were relieved you were born on 09/12 and not 9/11, even though there will always be close thoughts of the terror attacks of that day around your birthday.

I’m saddened that your birthplace, Charleston, had experienced an act of evil at a place of worship, just blocks away from the church where we worship as a family.

I’m saddened and in disbelief that shootings still happen in schools all too frequently.

I am really sorry. At the same time, I still have hope, thanks to you. You are a daily reminder that we are born with love in our hearts and not hate. I have hope for a future full of harmony and world peace. One day I hope people will put down the guns and let go of hate and learn to love.

If only everyone could see the world as you do today. The world certainly would be a much better place. The world is still your oyster little one. Spread your love. As the banner in your nursery reads: The World Awaits.