The New Girl

    11

    Truth be told, I’ve never really been “the new girl.” Even from the beginning of elementary school, I never felt out of place because I had friends from my neighborhood that started each school year with me. When I started middle school, I had some of those same elementary school friends going to the same school. The school I went to was a private school and was adding a grade level each year. I started my time there in sixth grade, continued through high school, and was a member of the first graduating class. Of course, friends came and went throughout those years, but I never had to go out of my way to make friends. My graduating class was only 51 people, and we were a pretty close-knit group.

    Entering college, I had several high school friends attending the same college and I was still in the same city. I lived at home and commuted. I made new friends in my classes, but again didn’t have to go out of my way. I got my first teaching job and two of the girls that I student taught with got jobs at the same school. My husband and I went to the same church from the time we started dating and we were there for ten years. When you live in the same city for almost thirty years, you know people. Even in a bigger city like Charlotte, I still had a lot of the same friends throughout the different stages of my life. Don’t get me wrong, I like meeting new people and I’d even go as far as to say that I’m pretty social. However, I just haven’t been in a place in my life where I really had to work at making new relationships. 

    Until now…

    Being the new girl in a new city

    When our family moved to Charleston over the summer, it was the first time I had ever lived away from Charlotte. All of my family still lives in Charlotte and most of my husband’s does as well. It’s all I had ever known. the new girl

    I remember driving up to our new townhouse here in Hanahan and having a panic attack. The decision for us to move here and the details that followed were made pretty quickly. We didn’t even have the time to make a trip to come and look for a place to live. My best friend and her family live in Mount Pleasant, and she graciously drove around looking at places, taking pictures, meeting with leasing staff, etc. all in the week or two leading up to our move. (Everyone needs this kind of friend in their life! She is a godsend). Anyway, back to moving day…

    I’ll never forget how I felt that day. I was trying so hard to be “okay” and to keep my happy face on as we carried box after box into our new home. That weekend went by like the blink of an eye and before I knew it I was alone. 

    the new girl

    It’s tough to be the new girl as an adult. If I’m honest, I felt VERY alone the first two months or so that we were here. I knew that I had to start making an effort to meet people. Starting to write for the Charleston Moms Blog was one of the first ways I decided to try and connect. Although I don’t know any of you personally, and we have never met face to face, I feel a connection, whether I’m reading other’s blog posts or writing my own. This blog has been a wonderful outlet for me. 

    I’ve also started meeting some of my neighbors and relationships have begun to form. Connecting with other moms at my church has been another great way for me to feel less lonely. 

    I know it will continue to take time, but I am grateful for the relationships that have already started forming. I appreciate the opportunity to be a part of this Charleston Moms Blog community, and I thank all of you that read our posts. 

    If you’re ever the new girl in a town, a job, a school, etc. I’d encourage you to step out of your comfort zone a little bit and reach out to those around you. As women and as moms we have got to come together and support one another! 

    the new girl

    11 COMMENTS

    1. Welcome Meredith! Our family moved here during the summer as well, and I felt the EXACT same way as you! Truth be told, I still feel that way! If your ever out and about and want to grab coffee, plan a play date for our kiddos (I have a 4-year-old son also!) or something, I’d love that! Knowing others feel the same way I do definitely helps… thanks for the wonderful post!

    2. I sure can relate this post Meredith! Having just moved to Columbia after all of my years in one or just two places, relationships that that turned into true friendships all left for a city of unknown. Thank goodness I am only two hours from what has become normal in my life…. Charleston! I know your sweet friend and she is indeed sweet and thank goodness a friend of mine too. Glad to have met you and I look forward to getting to know you even better over time.

    3. This is SO true! I stay at home now with our babies so some days, I am aching to chat with another mom/friend! I am looking forward to these neighborhood groups to make some more connections. Thanks for sharing!

      • Anna-So sorry that I’m just now seeing this. I hope that you have made some connections. This blog is a wonderful way to connect with other moms.

    4. Oh my goodness, I can so relate! I have been the “new girl” many times in my life, and it never gets easier. I’m about to start all over again when we move to Charleston in 5 weeks! Thank you for writing this, as it helps to know you aren’t the only one going through something. I hope that I too will eventually find my place in Charleston.

      • Thanks Leah! Charleston is a great place to live! I’m sure you will have no trouble fitting in. Definitely keep following Charleston Moms Blog. This has been a great resource for me!

    5. my husband, myself and our 3 kids are flying down on 4/21 to look at houses in Charleston. We are from NH, and as excited as I am for this new adventure, like you, I have never been “the new girl” before, and that scares me a little bit. Thank you so much for this post. Reading this made me feel a bit better, knowing that it is normal feeling to have. God bless!

      • Hi Nicole! I hope you guys were able to find a place. When will you be moving? Charleston is a great place to live!

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