So I’m in this sweet spot right now. We have two children, and we want a third, but we haven’t started trying yet. My son is almost three, and my daughter is about fourteen months. I feel like I’m in such a good place because the threenager hasn’t reared it’s ugly head nor are the terrible two’s upon us. I’m not naïve enough to think things will stay this way, but I am really enjoying where we are. I mean, I actually get to sleep most nights only waking to go to the bathroom….although now that I said that I’m sure frequent night waking will happen from teething. Anyway, I digress, my point is that I am an overachiever, a recovering perfectionist, constantly pushing myself to do more or better, but recently I’ve come this conclusion: I’m just a mom, and I’m pretty fine with it.
I used to get all bent out of shape because I don’t do anything that makes money anymore. I would constantly compare myself to everyone else out there doing Lularoe, Usborne, Arbonne, Etsy, etcetera, or the amazing mamas out there working full-time outside of the home. I still give them a lot of credit, I really do, but I have come to the conclusion that those things are not for me. While it’s really hard to know that I don’t contribute to our income, I am blessed to be able to stay home with the children…and I actually really want to stay home with them. (Yes, I know, I’m sure it will get more difficult, but I don’t want to know about it yet).
I’m tired of trying to do everything, and I’m tired of beating myself up if I’m not doing something extra all the time. Do you ever feel like you just want to be at home with your kids? I mean, when they are not driving you bonkers? I feel like society has placed so much pressure on us to get out there and be these supermoms that have all the new gadgets, pack all the healthiest snacks, teach our kids everything and still keep a spotless house and maybe have a little side gig making money. Seriously, how do women find the time to do it all?
I’m going to admit that I don’t do it all anymore, I’m just a mom. I’ve found what works for my children the best is limiting screen time to half an hour, having a good solid routine, and plugging in one on one time with MOM. Every. Single. Day. They respond so well to it, especially when I throw my phone across the room, ahem, leave it sitting on a table somewhere.
I had a day recently where my husband was gone from early in the morning until bedtime. Typically, when he comes home from a day like that I’m running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to stay out of the wine. But this particular night he asked me how it went, and I shrugged, “eh, it was actually pretty good”. That may not seem like a big deal to some, but for me that was a huge eye-opening experience. I made it through an entire day with both children and it was good!
That led me to believe that for me, being just a mom is the best I can be. It doesn’t mean I don’t occasionally miss stage managing or making money, but it does mean that I’m doing something right in this marathon of motherhood and chances are, you are too.
Just be a mom today.